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Teddy Ruxpin, Tickle Me Elmo and Now… Dance Star Mickey

November 22nd, 2010

Mickey Mouse Dancing Doll Tyler TexasWith Christmas around the corner, and a three year old at home I thought it might be helpful for friends and extended family to express my feelings about new toy which will without a doubt make the list of the all- time most annoying gifts of Christmas past. In the tradition of Teddy Ruxpin and Tickle Me Elmo comes Disney’s latest assault on responsible parenting. Dance Star Mickey has the potential to be even more unbearable than either of its aforementioned predecessors, and that by the way is saying something! I don’t have to warn Moms and Dads that this is a gift other people give your child.

In the interest of full disclosure, I’ve not been a fan of Disney for some time. As a history teacher I’ve been frequently appalled by students who believed that John Smith and Pocahontas were lovers, Thank you Disney for whoring out our history! Their formulamatic story lines, and insistence on making movies which correspond with their theme park rides, (after the fact mind you), hasn’t helped their cause in my mind. I keep waiting for the cinematic release of “TEA Cups, the Movie!” I will make one exception in my case against Disney, that being for their one franchise with any originality or imagination left. Of course I’m referring to Pixar, their writers and animators are genius.

The fact is I’ve never quite understood why the entertainment giant has made such a point of making Mickey Mouse it’s sort of, flagship character. I mean, when was the last time the marsupial stared in a full length, feature film? I can only assume that Dance Star Mickey has come about as a result of dance craze television shows like “So You Think You Can Dance,” and “Dancing with the Stars.” My little guy is a great kid, but he already knows how to make noise. The last thing I need right now is a stuffed toy that makes him more efficient at his noise making. And by the way, isn’t the great thing about stuffed toys the fact that they are silent? That and they also double as a pillow.

Elmo DollOf course this toy will find a huge market; kids will love it, especially if they see the rest of the family watching dance shows on television. But then kids will generally enjoy whatever you happen to get them, provided you do better than socks, or the notorious pink bunny of “A Christmas Carol” fame. My advice is this: skip the dancing mouse this year, and tell grandpa and grandma to do the same. Tell them… I know tell them you’ll leave out the mousetraps on Christmas Eve night. I’m betting you’ll have a much more peaceful New Year!